{"id":17881,"date":"2017-03-08T01:58:33","date_gmt":"2017-03-08T01:58:33","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.thefastfashion.com\/?p=17881"},"modified":"2017-03-08T01:58:33","modified_gmt":"2017-03-08T01:58:33","slug":"holding-knife-just-stabbed-young-sisters-struggling-terrible-night-dad-murdered-mum","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.thefastfashion.com\/?p=17881","title":{"rendered":"“He was holding a knife and just stabbed her”: Young sisters struggling with terrible night their dad murdered their mum"},"content":{"rendered":"

Lottie, Chelsea and Chloe are just three of the children being helped by at bereaved children\u2019s charity Winston\u2019s Wish<\/h2>\n

Little Leah is drawing a picture of her mummy and daddy, and is carefully colouring in her mother\u2019s blonde hair.<\/p>\n

But dad is holding a knife. The four-year-old searches through the crayons, saying: \u201cI need red for the blood.\u201d<\/p>\n

When a counsellor asks her what happened, she adds quietly: \u201cThey had a little fight and he stabbed mummy.\u201d<\/p>\n

Meanwhile her sister Lilly, two years her senior, asks: \u201cHow do you spell \u2018killed\u2019? Is it a curly \u2018c\u2019 or a kicking \u2018k\u2019?\u201d<\/p>\n

The sisters are on the UK\u2019s only residential weekend to help children bereaved by murder or manslaughter.<\/p>\n

And they are trying to write words or draw pictures to build the story of what happened to them.<\/p>\n

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Sisters Lottie, Chelsea and Chloe with their nan Jackie (Photo: Channel4)<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Every day a child in England and Wales loses a family member in this horrific way, so sadly there are many others like Leah and Lilly.<\/p>\n

Sisters Chloe, now 13, Chelsea, 10, and nine-year-old Lottie were asleep in bed when their dad burst into the house with a knife and murdered their mother, stabbing her repeatedly before turning the knife on himself.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe slashed her throat then stabbed her 22 times. How could he do that, knowing his young children were upstairs and could\u2019ve found them like that?\u201d asks maternal grandmother Jackie, who now cares for the girls.<\/p>\n

\u201cThe hardest thing now is answering their questions, like \u2018Where are mummy and daddy now? and \u2018Are they together?\u2019\u201d<\/p>\n

Thankfully there\u2019s help from the extraordinary grief professionals at bereaved children\u2019s charity Winston\u2019s Wish.<\/p>\n

Now a moving Channel 4 film, A Killing In My Family, follows eight families on the weekend.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s devastating to see the youngsters explain to the group why they are there. \u201cI\u2019ve come here to remember my mum Hayley and my dad David,\u201d says Chloe.<\/p>\n

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A drawing by Chelsea shows her going back to sleep after the horrific events (Photo: Channel4)<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n
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Bereaved children are encouraged to write about their experiences as part of the recovery process (Photo: Channel4)<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

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A note written by a bereaved child whose parent was killed as part of a bereavement support group<\/span> (Photo: Channel4)<\/span><\/p>\n

But Leah, remembering her mum Mika, just lowers her head and wipes away a tear, unable to say the words.<\/p>\n

Four of the families lost a mum, two lost a dad or step dad, one a brother \u2013 and for Chloe, Chelsea and Lottie it was both parents<\/a> .<\/p>\n

They sit in a circle as the team encourages them to share their tales and hopefully feel less alone.<\/p>\n

Gemma Allen, a senior practitioner at Winston\u2019s Wish, whose mum Diana died when she was 10, says: \u201cMurder can happen to ordinary families. To come along and leave themselves so open and vulnerable and exposed, that can be terrifying.<\/p>\n

\u201cBut they need to be with others who have experienced a murder. They just need to be with people who get it.\u201d<\/p>\n

Gemma asks the 15 children to write a story to help clarify what happened to them. They are told not to be afraid to use words like \u201cshot\u201d, \u201cstabbed\u201d or \u201cmurdered\u201d. Chloe, Chelsea and Lottie write their story, including stick-figure drawings of themselves asleep in bed.<\/p>\n

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Sisters Lottie, Chelsea,and Chloe with Gemma Allen, a senior practitioner at Winston’s Wish<\/span> (Photo: Channel4)<\/span><\/p>\n

Chelsea reads: \u201cOne day my mum and dad split up. Dad was jealous and came up with a plan.<\/p>\n

\u201cMum answered the door but he was holding a knife and he barged in and just stabbed her. Then he walked into our room and said \u2018Night\u2019.<\/p>\n

\u201cEven though I was awake I pretended to be asleep. I woke up but there was a policeman carrying me. I was confused. Then Nan said they had passed away but I didn\u2019t know what passed away meant.\u201d<\/p>\n

You can see the pain etched on the grief counsellors\u2019 faces as they listen, especially when Chelsea says she finds it hard to cry, saying: \u201cI just don\u2019t feel right when I let tears out in front of people.\u201d<\/p>\n

But later, in a candlelit ceremony for all the children to remember their loved ones, the three sisters cry together for the first time. Lottie says: \u201cI love them and miss them. They made me smile.\u201d<\/p>\n

Gemma says: \u201cOften the ceremony is the first time since the funeral they\u2019ve stopped and thought about who\u2019s died. Some may never have cried.\u201d<\/p>\n

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A description written by a child about the death of a parent<\/span> (Photo: Channel4)<\/span><\/p>\n

There\u2019s also help for the guardians of these children, often parents of those killed. In a therapy session, grandma Jackie says of the man who murdered her daughter: \u201cHe wasn\u2019t nasty, he wasn\u2019t violent, he was just Dave. You miss him as much as you do her. They\u2019d been together so many years.\u201d<\/p>\n

Lilly and Leah\u2019s paternal grandmother, Gill, says in tears: \u201cMy daughter-in-law and son had an argument. He told us she\u2019d gone missing, but a week later a police officer told us they\u2019d found so much blood in the house that they knew they were looking for a body. That\u2019s the first time we found out he\u2019d stabbed her.<\/p>\n

\u201cNow he\u2019s in prison for manslaughter. I miss my daughter-in-law but still love my son.\u201d<\/p>\n

Leah and Lilly are set to visit their dad in jail for the first time. Lilly says: \u201cI\u2019m really excited to see my dad. He writes us letters.\u201d<\/p>\n

When police family liaison officer Supt Simon Atkinson arrives on the course to take questions from the youngsters, Lilly asks him bluntly: \u201cWhy did my dad kill my mum?\u201d It\u2019s not a question that is easily answered.<\/p>\n

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The sisters are using drawing to help with bereavement<\/span> (Photo: Channel4)<\/span><\/p>\n

The children also attend a \u201cdifficult feelings\u201d session, where they are encouraged to write, draw or share any feeling, using flashcards to help.<\/p>\n

O\u2019Shae, 15, whose dad was shot dead, says he can feels angry and aggressive. Brother Mikeal, eight, has written \u201cterrified\u201d \u2013 he\u2019s worried that someone else close to him will die.<\/p>\n

As they prepare for a balloon release, the children must write a message to their loved one, as well as a wish for the future. Lilly says: \u201cI wish my mum could come back alive.\u201d<\/p>\n

Gemma says: \u201cThere\u2019s no magic wand. We know we haven\u2019t fixed it. But hopefully what they\u2019re leaving with is hope to continue the conversations, that what they\u2019re feeling is normal.\u201d<\/p>\n

For more information visit www.winstonswish.org.uk<\/span><\/p>\n